Is there a perfect profile of a pedophile? The answer is no. Is there a good profile of a pedophile? Absolutely, there are many. You can find them all over the web, including the pedophile profile on Liberated From Abuse. However, the best question is, is there a profile for all pedophiles?
A debate that has lasted for many years, researched for decades, and utilized from the dawning of its existence, the pedophile profile. It can be used as a great affirmation tool when suspecting occurrences of abuse. Pedophiles range in age, race, wealth, gender, occupation, and just about any other way to categorized individuals. Wouldn’t it make sense that the characteristics of pedophiles would also vary within the subgroup?
The following are responses from a boylover (adult male attracted to young boys) to Eleven Ways to Spot a Pedophile by Samantha Wilson of KidProofUSA.com. He wrote the responses for a bit of compare and contrast entertainment value, yet his entertainment became LFA education. While reading, keep in mind the article excerpts used are heavily grounded in research, and quite effective in spotting pedophiles. However, the percentage spotted is up for debate.
1. Shows an intense interest in children and childlike things.
It is hard not to care about kids. In fact, you may be suspicious of those who show no interest in children at all. However, there is a balance between average or appropriate interest, and excessive interest. Pedophiles will find everything about your child interesting, seem to relate to them better than adults, and prefer their company.
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RESPONSE: I show no unusual interest in kids or their activities. In fact, I find many kids to be rather annoying. (please don't kill me...) I generally relate to children considerably worse than most others, and I tend to prefer the company of adults.
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2. Has idealistic views of children.
A pedophile may refer to children as pure and innocent, and put them on a pedestal. They may think of children as “projects, offering them extra help after school, for instance, or arranging meetings with the child for ostensibly good and honest reasons. They will likely invest a great deal of time and effort in one
child, rather than offering equal attention to an entire group of kids. Some pedophiles have a belief that they are looking out for and have genuine love for children.
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RESPONSE: First, I feel obliged to point out the inconsistency between saying that it's a sign of a predator to think of children as 'innocent', while at the same time saying that they're evil because they take away innocence.
Next...I don't think kids are pure or innocent. Or rather, they lose that quality pretty early on. Few kids are outright evil, but it's also a minority that is 'innocent'.
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3. Has limited peer relationships.
A pedophile feels more comfortable around children. They do not often associate with peers in their age group. They would much prefer to sit at the “children’s table” at a dinner party than with the adults.
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RESPONSE: Children in general make me uncomfortable. I don't relate well to most of them.
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4. Calls children “friends.”
Pedophiles will surround themselves with childlike things that attract children and encourage friendships. A pedophile will often be the “cool older guy” in town, and you may find that many kids hang out at his house. He will attract kids with his lack of rules and defiance of parental rules and controls.
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RESPONSE: No child has ever been in my apartment, and I really don't foresee that changing.
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5. Is over twenty-five years old, single, never married, lives alone or with parents.
Just because someone matches this description does not mean he is a pedophile. However, if he meets several other criteria listed here, you should be seeing this as a warning sign.
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I'm under 25.
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6. Moves often and unexpectedly.
Often pedophiles will feel they have “worn out their welcome” in a particular community, or feel they are close to getting caught. They will move regularly to avoid detection, confrontation from suspecting parents, or to find a new pool of victims.
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RESPONSE: In the last fifteen years, I have only lived in two places. They're less than five miles from each other. And it's hardly 'unexpected' to move when entering college.
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7. Participates and organizes activities that exclude other adults.
For obvious reasons, a pedophile needs access and privacy to commit the abuse. He will avoid inviting other adults on planned events or outings.
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RESPONSE: On the very rare occasion that I plan any sort of gathering, I invite either exclusively adults or entire families.
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8. Takes excessive photographs of children
Pedophiles collect photographs, mementoes, symbols, and anything else from their victims and or other targets that might enhance their fantasies. Most notably, they take an inappropriate number of pictures or videos of children, in their communities, at events, or simply when playing. The pedophile may also have a lot of child-focused movies or music CDs, more than seems appropriate for a single man to possess. These are used for fantasy as well as to lure children into their homes.
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RESPONSE: I rarely take photographs of any kind. And most of the ones I do take are nature themed.
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9. Works and plays in areas that attract children.
Pedophiles typically choose work environments that allow access to children. This may include working in a school (as a teacher or in some other capacity) or daycare, as a coach or as a volunteer in a community centre, or in any other profession that is child- focused.
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RESPONSE: Nope.
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10. Decorates his home with childlike décor.
A pedophile is constantly trying to attract children, and relates to them better than to adults. His home, dress, and demeanor will often reflect childlike characteristics.
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If one were to describe my residence, "childlike" is not a word that would come to mind.
Incidentally, isn't this pretty similar to sign 4?
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11. Is generous with gifts.
Many pedophiles choose targets that are needy—both for material things and for attention. They are quick to provide a needy child with toys, games, and money to lure them into a position of trust and eventually a sense of indebtedness.
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RESPONSE: I do tend to be the generous type....but with close friends or family only. I'm skeptical of people I don't know of any age, and I rarely come into contact with children.
He ends with, “This was surprisingly enjoyable.” Why was it so enjoyable? He matched zero of eleven; in fact, he was almost on the other end of the spectrum on most of the points.
Above are eleven extremely effective ways to spot a pedophile, many very similar to LFA’s version of the pedophile profile. The most important idea that should be coming to the forefront if your mind is that there is no way to spot every pedophile.
With that said, please do not see this as paranoid. Furthermore, please do not become paranoid as a result of reading this. The underlying theme is to be cautious and safe.
How can you alleviate the paranoia? Teach your children well. The tried and true prevention does not lie within a set of guidelines aimed to zero in on pedophiles, although informative, they are not the end all. The true prevention begins with the education of young people. It is the adults’ responsibility to bequeath the information, so a child can take part of the responsibility of being safe. It is also the adults’ responsibility to choose safe situations for the child.
Pedophile profiles do tend to vary, but most have similar attributes. However, a comprehensive profile would have to include every character trait ever personified by every human being that ever lived.
There are also dangers when providing guidelines. Another boylover clearly illustrates this with some gut wrenching points.
“The worst part of making guidelines is the really dangerous child predators are laughing there asses off because they know they are above suspicion. That list does not apply to them other than they look for places where they can find a child alone.
I hate child predators, they usually are active members of churches and show little interest in children. Their interest is in people who have power and control.
If they do go into coaching it is because of the control. They tend to scream at their players for not doing exactly what they demand. They make the children perform out of fear and take all the joy out of the game.
They enjoy auto racing for the crashes and wrestling for the violence and police pursuits on TV and have to tell anyone who will listen how great all that is. There video collection will be heavy in horror and violence and their porn collections will be the most depraved and not much with children except domination and bondage.
They have a hard time keeping a job because they don't like being told what to do and often start rumors to attack a person with more authority.
They are not social outcasts but tend to be very personable because that draws them the praise they so desire.
Again a person with these traits can be completely innocent but this type as a child predator is a man who can damage a child for life and even kill with no remorse.”
The images portrayed above are realities in the paraphilias. Many abusers are not sexually attracted to children, but desire power and control. Others are attracted to children, but do not intend harm.
Other dangers are illustrated by the same man.
“How many innocent people will these KIDPROOF guidelines destroy when someone sees a neighbor who in their mind fits the mold? My hope is that Thor will not say there need to be better guidelines because these BLs [boylovers] don't fit. These guidelines are dangerous to innocent people who just want to help children.”
This has also been a great concern of LFA since its publishing of the pedophile profile. It is this publication that gets the most heat. The heat comes from teachers, coaches, and child advocates that display a lot of the characteristics described in the profile. They fear being pinned as pedophiles when they are simply lovers of children.
The response to them is always the same; if you don’t harm children, then you have nothing to worry about. However, they still feel that the profiles can ruin their credibility with the general public such as parents, students, or colleagues if they exhibit the described behaviors.
Although profiles can be damaging, they are also necessary to inform parents of common (or somewhat common) characteristics of pedophiles. After all, parents and caregivers need something of a home base to protect the youngsters they care about so deeply. Without the profile, where should we begin? How do we keep our children safe?
Again, teach your children well.
Eleven Ways to Spot a Pedophile by Samantha Wilson was used in part with permission from Samantha Wilson and
